Best Man Duties: Don’t Steal Bride! Do These Things Instead

by Yvette in — Updated April 28, 2024 — Reading Time: 7 minutes

Congratulations on being chosen to be the best man at your friend’s or family member’s wedding. It’s truly an honor for your loved one to trust you to ensure that their special day succeeds – we’ve got some ideas to help you with that.

But, while being the best man is exciting, it comes with some responsibilities that may make it overwhelming.

Many men think the best man’s only job is to give a speech and crack jokes during the ceremony. But this role involves more than that.

The best man is the go-to person for the groom (or girl if he has opted for a woman). The duties of a best man include planning a bachelor party, ensuring the groomsmen’s attires are in order, delivering the best man’s speech at the reception, etc.

If you want to be the BEST best man ever, use this checklist to know your duties before, during, and after the wedding.

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Key Takeaway

  • The best man has important responsibilities like planning the bachelor party, coordinating with the wedding party, and handling any emergencies on the big day.
  • Leading up to the wedding, the best man should help with planning, attend meetings, and collaborate with the maid of honor.
  • On the wedding day, the best man will guide people, keep things on time, hold the rings, give a memorable toast, and kickstart dancing at the reception.
  • Even after the wedding, the best man has duties like assisting with the marriage certificate signing, organizing gifts, and providing emotional support to the newlywed couple.

Pre-wedding Responsibilities

Bachelor Party Planning

A bachelor party is a tradition that includes many shapes and sizes. It can be an event on a yacht, a golfing day, or a night out in the club.

One of the best man’s duties is to plan the entire celebration and recruit other groomsmen to help with the planning.

The bachelor party may not be your last time out with the groom. But it may be the last time hanging out with him as a bachelor. For this reason, strive to plan the best party ever.

That means a lot of planning, venue scouting, and logistics. Consider the groom’s preferences. If he doesn’t like hanging out in a strip club, do not plan the party there.

Also, bear in mind that sometimes the best man may foot the bill for this event.

Coordination with the Maid of Honor

While not always an explicit responsibility, maintaining open communication with the maid of honor is advisable. By engaging with her, you can assess how best to support the couple on their special day.

This collaboration may involve practical considerations such as securing umbrellas in case of inclement weather or coordinating the presentation of gifts during the wedding festivities.

Wedding Planning Process

The best man is also part of the team that helps plan the wedding. His input is required on various things like guest lists, suits for the groomsmen, organizing groomsmen’s gifts, etc.

You should, therefore, be present in the meetings to help with decision-making. Remember, the groom entrusted you to make his day successful. So, commit yourself to being part of this team without failure.

The Wedding Day Essentials

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A Guide to the Wedding Day

Your main job as the best man on the wedding day is to make sure everything goes smoothly. Keep an eye on the schedule to prevent delays and confusion. Ask the couple for a rundown of the day’s events beforehand so you know what to expect.

You might need to play the role of a guide, gently directing people where they need to be and keeping things organized, especially during photo sessions.

Handling the rings is also part of your responsibility. Keep them safe and be ready to present them during the ceremony.

On the morning of the wedding, join the groom and groomsmen as they get ready. Help the groom stay calm and relaxed.

It’s also your job to keep the atmosphere lively and cheerful. Put on some music and offer refreshments, making sure the groom stays hydrated and eats before the ceremony.

Wedding Ceremony and Reception

The bride and groom need two witnesses to sign their marriage documents to make it official. These two people are usually the maid of honor and the best man.

The best man is also responsible for giving a toast. In most cases, he is the one to start the round of toast during dinner. Since this is an important duty, please ensure you have practiced and crafted your toast well.

At the wedding reception, you need to keep things alive and moving. Ensure that the groom is having the best day of his life. Mingle with the guests often and get the dance floor started.

Remember that the best men are usually the ones to start the first dance. So dance with the bride-groom, maid of honor, couple’s parents, grandparents, and other key relatives.

Also, depending on the wedding setup, you may be in charge of collecting gifts and taking them to the right place. If a couple has chosen a specific place to store the gifts, the best man should collect and take them there to prevent guests from running around.

Managing Emergencies

Unexpected situations may still occur even with proper planning. As the best man, you should prepare for this.

Carry an emergency kit with toiletries like bandages, tissues, and pain relievers. Also, bring an extra pair of socks, extra cufflinks, an extra tie, shoe polish, a sewing kit, and stain remover.

Again, carry some cash for emergencies.

Be on the lookout for any emergency that may happen during the ceremony, and plan for it.

Specific Duties and Rituals

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The Role of the Best Man in Key Rituals

The best man holds significant roles in key wedding rituals. This includes the following:

  • assisting with wedding attire, making sure the groom looks his best by helping with selecting and ordering formal wear
  • coordinating fittings with groomsmen
  • ensuring everyone looks sharp and coordinated

Additionally, the best man typically selects the ring bearer, who carries the wedding rings down the aisle. This role signifies the bond and trust between the couple and the ring bearer, a tradition deeply embedded in wedding ceremonies.

Supporting the Wedding Party

As the best man, you play a crucial role in ensuring smooth coordination within the wedding party and between the groom and his family members.

Your responsibilities include keeping communication clear and addressing any concerns that arise. Additionally, maintaining precise timing and organization is essential to orchestrating a flawless ceremony.

Whether guiding guests to their seats or leading the festivities, your presence sets the pace for a memorable celebration. These efforts highlight the importance of the best man’s role in facilitating communication and order during the wedding festivities.

Rehearsal Dinner Participation

As the Best Man, one of your key pre-wedding responsibilities is orchestrating the rehearsal dinner. Take charge of pairing and gathering bridesmaids and groomsmen for this crucial event, ensuring that everyone knows their roles and responsibilities for the big day.

Use this opportunity not only to ensure a smooth run-through but also to foster a sense of camaraderie at the wedding party. Additionally, consider offering a heartfelt toast during the rehearsal dinner, setting a tone of celebration and anticipation for the upcoming festivities.

Emotional and Practical Support

Being the Groom’s Right-Hand Man

The best man should offer the groom emotional support. That means listening to his concerns, inquiries, and revelations without judging. He needs to part with the groom on the back and remind him to remain focused.

Also, he should handle any travel plans and hotel arrangements. If the groom has people traveling from far, the best man should set up to ensure they have a place to sleep. He also needs to know where the groom and groomsmen will sleep if it is a destination wedding.

Ensuring a Great Time

As the Best Man, part of your duty is to curate an unforgettable experience for the groom, one that he’ll cherish for years to come.

Elevate the pre-wedding festivities by organizing activities tailored to his interests and preferences.

Whether it’s a day on the golf course, a friendly competition of video games, or any other activity that resonates with the groom, your efforts will contribute to creating a positive and memorable atmosphere, setting the stage for the celebration ahead.

Post Wedding Responsibilities

After the wedding, the best man’s responsibilities extend to post-wedding tasks aimed at ensuring a smooth transition for the newlyweds.

One crucial aspect involves following up on the wedding reception, which includes overseeing the handling of the getaway car and ensuring the safe return of any rented items used during the festivities.

Additionally, the best man assists the newlyweds with administrative matters such as assisting with the signing of the marriage certificate and license.

This role requires attention to detail and may involve coordinating with the appropriate authorities to ensure all legal requirements are met.

Moreover, the best man continues to support the newlyweds by helping with various post-wedding tasks. This could involve anything from organizing gifts received at the reception to providing emotional support during the initial days of marriage.

Overall, the best man’s post-wedding responsibilities are essential in ensuring the smooth conclusion of the wedding celebrations and the beginning of the couple’s journey into married life.

Best Man Etiquette and Tips

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Speech Tips and Ideas

Crafting a remarkable speech transcends mere recitation of rehearsed sentiments. It’s an opportunity to weave together creativity and sincerity, infusing your words with humor, heartfelt anecdotes, and genuine memories shared with the groom.

Capture the essence of his character and your relationship, engaging the audience with authentic reflections. Remember, brevity is paramount to maintaining guests’ attention and leaving a lasting impression.

So, let your speech resonate with authenticity and warmth, creating a memorable moment that celebrates the bond between you and the groom.

Understanding the Best Man’s Role and Being the Best Man

As the groom’s right-hand man, it’s imperative to grasp the full extent of your responsibilities without overstepping boundaries.

Familiarize yourself with the duties expected of you and exercise discretion in your actions. Avoid overbearing behavior and maintain a balance between support and intrusion.

Exemplifying the qualities of an exceptional best man goes beyond mere participation. Educate yourself on the essential traits such as punctuality, effective communication, and impeccable coordination skills.

Strive to embody these qualities throughout the wedding journey, serving as a reliable anchor amidst the whirlwind of preparations and celebrations.

By demonstrating unwavering support and dedication, you’ll fulfill your role with distinction and leave a lasting impression on the groom and guests alike.


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The best man is someone the groom can put his faith in when marrying the love of his life. He is to ensure that the wedding and events leading to it go on smoothly. This is not easy work. It’s an investment of your time, effort, and money.

But it is all worth it. Thanks to your hard work and sacrifice, the wedding will be a fun and memorable experience for everyone on the guest list.

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