Funny Bible Verses About Marriage (From Humor to Serious Insight)

by Niki in — Updated February 7, 2024 — Reading Time: 4 minutes

The Book of Proverbs, a treasured part of the Old Testament of the Bible, offers readers a wealth of wisdom and guidance including sex before marriage. In addition, it’s a place for funny bible verses about marriage.

It’s important to remember that these proverbs originally aimed to provide profound insights for maintaining a healthy and fun marriage

Proverbs is considered one of the Wisdom Books. It is a collection of ancient Hebrew wisdom literature that offers practical advice, moral guidance, and insights on how to live a wise and righteous life. The Book of Proverbs is known for its concise and pithy sayings, often in the form of short, memorable verses or proverbs, which are meant to impart timeless wisdom.

Funny wedding vows - Couple laughing at their own wedding vows

King Solomon, also known as Solomon the Wise, plays a significant role in the Book of Proverbs. He is traditionally attributed as the author of many of the proverbs found in this book. Solomon was a renowned biblical figure known for his exceptional wisdom, wealth, and leadership.

Solomon was the son of King David and became the third king of Israel. He is perhaps best known for his legendary wisdom, as exemplified in the story of the two women who came to him claiming to be the mother of the same child. Solomon’s wise judgment in that case is a well-known biblical story.

Solomon’s wisdom and contributions to literature and knowledge are often celebrated in the Book of Proverbs, where his sayings and teachings are featured prominently. His reign is also characterized by prosperity and peace.

Funny moment during wedding ceremony

If you’re in the mood for more wedding-related humor, don’t miss my article on “Funniest Wedding Vows Ever Exchanged” where we celebrate the lighter side of tying the knot.

Wisdom Within The Humor

Proverbs 25:24 – “Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.”

King Solomon must have spent a few nights up on the roof to get away from his wife’s incessant nagging and realized – hey this isn’t so bad! A little breeze, can see the stars. Might even set up a cot and mini fridge up here.

Proverbs 12:4 – “A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”

So a virtuous wife makes the king feel like a king with his golden crown. But a contentious wife is like bone rot – a spreading, stabbing pain he just can’t get rid of no matter how hard he tries.

Proverbs 12:4 ESV – “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”

An excellent wife is a crown – so she makes him feel on top of the world! But a disgraceful one is bone rot – not just decay but full on rottenness. He’s hobbling around shouting “The rottenness! It burns!”

Proverbs 19:13 – “A foolish son is his father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping.”

Like Chinese water torture – the incessant drips that drive you insane. That’s what living with a quarrelsome wife is like. Except replace water drops with her shrill voice! Enough to push anyone over the edge.

Proverbs 27:15 – “A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm.”

One leaky roof drip is maddening enough, but get a rainstorm going and suddenly you’ve got a thousand drips driving you absolutely up the wall. Just like an argumentative wife – nag nag nag until you totally lose it!

Proverbs 11:22 – “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.”

She may look classy and elegant on the outside, but her horrible personality makes her about as refined as jewelry on farm animals. You can dress up a pig but it’s still going to roll around in the mud!

The Original “Serious” Intent

While my interpretations inject humor into the verses, it’s important to note that the original intent of these verses is to provide wisdom and guidance for healthy marriage.

man and woman hugging each other

1. Proverbs 25:24 – This verse emphasizes the difficulty of living with constant conflict in a marriage. It suggests that it’s better to find a peaceful and solitary place (like the corner of a roof) than to endure constant quarreling with a spouse.

2. Proverbs 12:4 (ESV) – This verse highlights the value of a virtuous and noble character in a wife. A loving and virtuous wife is a source of honor and happiness for her husband, while a disgraceful wife brings suffering.

man in white dress shirt and woman in black dress walking on beach during daytime

3. Proverbs 19:13 – This verse draws a comparison between a foolish son and a quarrelsome wife, both of whom can be sources of ruin and distress for their family.

4. Proverbs 27:15 – This verse uses the analogy of a leaky roof in a rainstorm to describe the annoyance and frustration caused by a quarrelsome wife. Just as a leaky roof can be irritating during a storm, constant arguments (both ways!) in a marriage can be disruptive and distressing.

5. Proverbs 11:22 – This verse cautions against prioritizing outward beauty over inner qualities like discretion and wisdom. It suggests that beauty without good character is as incongruous as putting a valuable gold ring in a pig’s snout.

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